Saturday, January 10, 2009

[thump, thump] Is This Thing On?


It’s one of the cardinal rules of marketing: know your audience. But, inherently, public web personae are just that… public. Public and blind. Dear reader, I can’t see you. I don’t know who you are. The whole thing is a little unfair to my taste. You get a window into my soul and I get… well, I get the odd comment now and then from one of the same four people.

Still, just when I am ready to conclude that it’s not worth the time it takes to format my personal journal entries for “public” consumption (is it still considered “public” if everyone can but nobody actually does see it?), then, out of the blue, a friend will verbally reference one of my entries. Or, I will receive a comment from someone I’ve never met. I don’t even know how they found this place.

And another thing - As much as I’d like to convince myself that maintaining this blog is valuable to me with or without readership, the truth is, I can enjoy the catharsis and other benefits of journaling/writing without posting here.

So why share my thoughts in an open forum? What do I hope to accomplish with this little exercise? I’m sure there are many reasons: working out my thoughts with unrestricted accountability, challenging readers to go deeper, weighing in on things important to me, staying connected with friends and family… but, for me, the most valuable implication of this little experiment is the opportunity to engage in thoughtful dialogue on meaningful issues; to exchange ideas; to reach for each other’s minds, take the floor and meringue a little while.

I won't pretend that everything I write might inspire you to weigh in. Still, you must find something of interest here from time to time or you wouldn't stop by.

So… hi, my name is James. I write this blog. But, enough about me. Tell me a little about yourself. What are your experiences? What's going on inside your head? [THUMP, THUMP, THUMP] “HELLO? IS THIS THING ON?”

[Click COMMENTS below and just go nuts... "hey, I read your blog," "these are the inane ramblings of an otherwise brilliant mental patient," "meusbonuspars changed my life," "James is crazy hot," ...heck, wherever the wind may take you.]
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Saturday, January 3, 2009

Graham's Fairy Tales

Once upon a time…

…I believed people were simply the product of their own choices.
…I dreamed I would be “discovered.”
…I saw personal weakness as something to be ashamed of.
…I feared exposure.
…I believed God considered me more than some people.
…I believed God liked me less than most people.
…I thought everyone was interested in knowing the truth.
…I thought I was always interested in the knowing the truth.
…I believed smarter was always better.
…I believed if people just took the time to know me, they would value me.
…I believed if people really knew me, they wouldn’t love me.
…I believed the world was a really big place.
…I imagined how much better off I might be if I were someone else.
…I found black and white more attractive than gray.
…I believed idealism was as noble as hope was naïve.
…I feared infinity.
…I thought it was alright to save my best effort for the right time.
…I thought the right time was when I had the most to gain or lose.
…I believed I knew how other people saw me.
…I believed I saw myself as I really am.

What happens when you discover you aren't the hero in your own story but, rather, the foe to be vaquished? I feel little shame by way of surrender knowing "happily ever after" depends on it. The protagonist costume is still a little roomy but I welcome the new perspective